The opening story is poignant. When I first read that she called out their bias I assumed that would be the end of the negotiation. It was awesome to hear that worked. I just wrote about the women I have worked with not willing to take risks, but this was awesome to read. Also, I guess I’m jaded working in Higher Ed but I know a bunch of women who work in high level positions in a lot of colleges. I totally respect that the percentages are off though. I wonder if this will change soon, though, because more women are enrolled in college now than men are.
Ok, first of all…I want to apologize on behalf of all men and white people. I guess my privilege got in the way of seeing how difficult life truly was for women. I had heard of all of the statistics about pay inequality, having to work harder, stereotypes keeping people down. I have heard this kind of speak from men and women alike. The piece on Female Bosses are the Worst is so widespread based on people’s internal biases that it has invaded my life in two different ways. The first was during this past election cycle. I actually just saw a video from The Onion (which I am better than Spicey and know that is a parody) but it was an actor portraying a PA steel worker who regretted his vote for Trump because he read 800 pages on feminist theory. The enlightening part, aside from it being funny, was the systems that are in place across media, and societies alike that paint women leaders to be ‘bitches’ or ‘mean’ or ‘nasty women’. Hillary Clinton has so many haters from her time in New York, my parents and most of my friend’s parents included for various reasons but I’ve always thought it had something to do with her being a strong woman. This had a direct impact on my life because we have Trump as President…. The next way it impacts my life was one time my family was hanging out and it was pre-election. My dad said that ‘women make terrible bosses’ and my fiancee was with me. It was quite embarrassing but I shrugged it off before I became so aware of my ability to dispute statements like this. It was actually the first time my fiancee told me she wishes I had stepped up. I would now to combat this kind of speech. I also liked the part on asking for forgiveness instead of permission…partially because I subscribe to this myself! This is totally true in my office environment. I have a tendency to take the risk and get a job done sacrificing a possible slap on the wrist later. The women I work with are way less likely to take this risk and I’ve seen this over the years. I can’t think of a specific example off the top of my head but I remember this coming up a few times. After this book and this class, I can confidently say I am a feminist!
I am a product of a working family. My mother is uneducated and doesn’t have any discernible skills to fall back on. I think, truthfully, part of my mother going to work is a product of neither of my parents having a college degree. It was out of necessity. I couldn’t imagine marrying my fiancée if she wasn’t a working woman. Not for the sense of keeping up with her half or anything like that, I mean so that she could have more of a sense of contribution and helping people the way she was meant to.
Mansplaining is something that I think people who are so out of touch with their social interactions will do. Unfortunately, that is a lot of men. I will say though, I have met a lot of women who do this socially as well. The one thing the article says, which I believe but just haven’t seen in my life, is that men are rewarded for speaking, while women are punished. Also, part of that is that I work in a very woman dominated field/office. We saw mansplaining on full display this past election cycle. I think the most unfortunate thing to come out of this election is that people think it’s OK to be an asshole now.
Since I went out of turn and kind of did a synthesizing post about poverty/race, I’ll come at Just Mercy with a different angle. I actually just commented on one of Faranda’s articles and it fits here as well. It fits quite well as someone who never has had to deal with systemic discrimination like Mr. Stevenson or his clients or many people I call friends. The story of Mr. McMillan is one all too familiar nowadays but the same idea can take on many different forms. It can be something so dragged out that it slowly consumes a life, or it can be in the blink of an eye that a life is taken/ruined because of internal biases and ideas that people can’t shake. There have been far too many police shootings that can be traced to a lot of different things. People want to blame inadequate training of police, minorities doing things they shouldn’t be doing…depends a lot on the news outlet you’re listening to and your own beliefs. Anyway, I follow Barstool Sports because I find their bloggers funny and they post funny videos. Every once in a while they post something that I find to be click bait and yesterday was one of those times. Clickbait meaning something to get a rise out of people in this scenario. It was a video of a group of black men looking like they were robbing a car. They’re in the middle of a street but they’re not holding any guns or visible weapons. The camera and apparently the police as well are about a good 150-200 feet away. The cops open fire on the young black men without any verbal warning or anything. The caption read, ‘rap group gets shot at filming music video’. My immediate response was to say, ‘why the hell were they doing this in the middle of the street!?’ I did say that out loud and I am so glad that I got the response I did because it put the entire Black Lives Matter into perspective for me once and for all and made me understand it (while I never was opposed to it). She said, ‘should they have been doing that? No. But why was his first reaction to shoot from 100 feet away.’ This got me to thinking back to when Mr. McMillan was arrested, with no evidence. Or when Mr. McMillan was sent to death row without getting a trial first…which is noted is illegal! Or when Mr. McMillan’s trial was moved, like demographics of a jury don’t make a difference. It makes you wonder, how could people hate someone or a type of person so much to create these injustices. The book is littered with situations like this of Stevenson’s clients and I knew I had heard this name elsewhere and I also saw it on 60 minutes so this stuck with me a little more. The point isn’t that Stevenson was able to get him exonerated, which obviously is a tremendous feat and very admirable rather that this happened in the first place. I was just talking with my best friend the other day who’s name will remain anonymous for obvious reasons. He told me he was arrested about a year ago for going to pick up our other friend from the police station while being intoxicated. I swear I don’t run with a tough crowd, it was an unfortunate mixup after a night of drinking where he got out of a cab before it was done moving and the police arrested him for being drunk in public. Anyway, cut to him entering the police station drunk which I actually had no idea was against the law. He gets detained but the case gets thrown out because he dressed himself well and actually showed up to the court date. I wonder if that’s all that swayed the judge’s mind? There are so many things that we did that we should have been in so much more trouble for than we got in. I’ve been let go by the police after being pulled over going 95 in a 55 when I was a teenager. I don’t drive this fast anymore obviously, so don’t worry. Point being, I literally shouldn’t even have my license now but here I am. I know of a few stories over the years who have done a lot less and were punished much more severely.